Assembled in The East Bay of California.
Operating in Brooklyn.

Red hair. Sort of tall.

-I do comedy at the UCB Theatre in NYC, which is fun.
-My YouTube Page holds some videos I'm pretty fond of.
-My Twitter account belongs on most "essential following" lists.

5th January 2012

Post with 14 notes

Vacation Jason’s New Years Resolutions

As I was reading it on air, I made the decision to cut out a chunk because I didn’t want to drag it out too long. Here’s the full bit.

  • Go on more vacations
  • Take some much needed “off time.”
  • Relax.
  • Chill out some more.
  • Hang loose as much as possible.
  • Build a boat.
  • Build a tent on my boat.
  • Build a miniature boat in a bottle in my tent on my boat.
  • Build a miniature tent in the bottle boat in my boat tent.
  • Eat three shrimp cocktails per day, every day in February.
    • Learn to let go of the past.
    • Move forward with my life.
    • Learn to live in the present.
    • Mail even more gifts to my ex-girlfriend Emily. I have to win her back. I know I have to. She is still the light of my life and I miss her so bad.
    • GET GOOGY.
    • Invite everybody TO GET GOOGY.
    • Turn GETTING GOOGY into a global movement.
    • Define “GETTING GOOGY”
    • Get to work on finally releasing the anticipated Island Hip Hop mixtape COCONUT BERRY LEMON TREE
    • Save enough money to produce COCONUT BERRY LEMON TREE
    • Commit to not blowing all of the money saved to produce COCONUT BERRY LEMON TREE on buying Dope Ass Aquariums
    • Buy a Dope Ass Aquarium as a gift to myself for completing COCONUT BERRY LEMON TREE.
    • Punch a shark in the face.
    • Kick a bear in the butt.
    • Slap a snake with a big branch.
    • Throw a porcupine like it’s a football. TOUCHDOWN!
    1. babytraubs reblogged this from robotriley
    2. corypalmer said: I couldn’t believe how funny this was. Some of VJ’s best work yet.
    3. robotriley posted this